

How to resist any temptation (Thursday's Therapy)
Amigos and amigas,
Exactly 1 month ago I started recording a video titled "how to resist your temptations so easily they retire from bullying you".
I wanted to answer the question: how can I take back control of my energy in a world built to drain it?
Why this matters...
Every time you give in to temptation, you’re training your brain to do it again (yes I wish this wasn't true but there's no point in sugar coating 🙃).
So temptation isn’t just a moment, it shapes your future. What you do today decides who you become tomorrow.
But the video was too shallow.
3 weeks later and I've only just finished researching it for a second time.
So straight from the video's notes, here are 3 reasons we cave to temptation and the most important solution to resisting them (heavily simplified for the sake of brevity).
3 reasons we cave to temptation...
1.) Evolution's nudge
Rewards used to be scarce. So desire (dopamine) evolved to make you act on impulse now because tomorrow the reward might not be guaranteed (food, mates, safety).
→ In other words: desire evolved to save us from dying.
→ Great for survival, messy for modern desires because they’re abundant.
Modern mismatch: your brain is ancient, the world is modern. This is why you experience constant cues that trigger micro-desires all day.
→ Brain thinks “SCARCITY! ACT NOW!” but in reality there isn’t a shortage.
2.) Neuroadaptation
Nutshell: the brain becomes less sensitive to stimuli after repeated exposure.
Why: to stop our attention from being drained by things that no longer matter.
Example: after visiting the same restaurant three times, your brain tunes out aromas and colours to focus on what matters; conversation, what to order, etc.
Your brain does the same with your temptations.
The more you do something, the more "used" to doing that thing your brain becomes so you no longer feel a sharp emotional pang when doing it (but that emotional pang is the exact thing you need to warn you against doing it).
Mechanism: repeated highs → dopamine receptors become less sensitive → duller pleasure → more stimulation needed → cravings get more intense.
3.) Emotional vulnerability and conditioning
Temptation helps you "turn on" instant pleasure and to “turn off” uncomfortable emotions.
The technical term for it = "relief learning".
The loop = negative state (boredom) → quick relief (scroll) → brain tags behaviour as “works” → impulses become automatic.
Memory glue: the remembered relief outweighs long-term costs → urges feel compulsory even when you “know better.”
Example: you scroll to escape stress → brain learns “scroll = relief.”
→ Soon: bored or stressed → instant scroll.
→ Try and resist = cravings spike.
→ Long term consequences = brain fog, poor social life, lack of energy.
→ But brain doesn't associate those consequences with scrolling as they're too far apart - your brain can't see how they're related as there isn't "instant punishment".
The solution?
Build awareness of urges without obeying them.
Why: you can’t control urges; only your response to them.
In other words: the goal isn’t suppression, it’s surfing.
Mindfulness / Urge Surfing:
• Urges are waves: they rise, peak, fade. Observe the craving as a wave, not a command.
Then ride it to shore.
How?
Sit in the space between thought and action by distracting yourself or letting the impulse RAIN on you:
1️⃣ Recognise (notice the craving as it appears).
2️⃣ Allow (let it exist, no judgment).
3️⃣ Investigate (what’s happening in your body?).
4️⃣ Note (label sensations simply: “tightness,” “buzzing,” “thinking”).
• Why it works: it interrupts the automatic impulse loop and strengthens prefrontal cortex “pause-and-plan” control.
→ Sit in that space for long enough and the urge will fade.
• Reframe: “This isn’t an emergency. It’s just energy moving through.”
Baltasar Gracián (philosopher): “Let the first impulse pass. Wait for the second.”
The video will be around 50+ minutes long and will cover:
The 5 reasons why temptation hijacks your brain.
The 5 solutions to resisting any temptation for good.
The upsides of impulsivity.
+More.
That's all for this week,
Thanks for reading,
Lew
P.s. you can join the wait list for my upcoming product here.
P.p.s got sum new pink sockz. not quite sure the special occasion.

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